You Don't Bring Me Flowers

I don't know if you remember that old heartbreak song "You Don't Bring Me Flowers" about a couple that had grown apart and the fella had stopped bringing trinkets for his lady - and it looks like the end is near and their love is doomed.

You Don't Bring Me Flowers

Well, my old lady couldn't say that of me!

I regularly bring her treats, like these sausages that were on special. If she chooses to make more of it, that's her problem.

You Don't Bring Me Flowers: my version

See, the old bat's thrilled to be with me. Yup, our marriage is strong and the good thing is, if I come home from work and she's dead and find that she hadn't cooked dinner, I can just throw her on the BBQ. 10 minutes later, problem solved.

Andrew Goulding

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